another day without him

November 10, 2009
Everyday without him keeps getting a lot harder. At first, I may not seem to feel the loneliness. But as time passes by, I felt that i just can't bear the pain for it tears me apart. I know that this will be hard for the both of us but i never imagined that it would be this painful. Everyday my heart aches. I want him beside me. I want to hear his voice, his jokes, his laughter. I always wonder whether he feels the same way as mine. I know that he's the kind of person whose not fond of showing his emotions to me especially when he's in agony. He does not not want me to know he;s crying for he wants me to be strong always. I don;t know what to do now. I dont know if my decision of breaking up with him is the right thing to do. Of course I am hurting. I can't describe how this feeling tortures me. He's my world. He's my strength. But i don't know if he would do something to mend my broken heart. We always have a problem when it comes to communicating with one another. Communication is all i ask from him. I want him to understand how much I need him right now. I hope he still cares for me. I hope he will do something for us. I hope that the person I have loved will not change. This pain and emptiness are making me weak, making me wanna give up.......